Looking for inspiration today, my good friend and amazing writer/editor, Kemari, gave me a list of words to use in my post. She called it the "Magpie Method" (whatever that means). Here's the list she gave me: Birthday, Balloon Animal, Radioactive Cupcake, Moldy Hummus, and Walkie-Talkie.
Here's what I gave her:
Pink is the Color of Shame
It’s my birthday today, and I am praying for radioactive cupcakes instead of the three-tiered cake with an obscene amount of ribbon. My parents have been planning this event for almost a year now, and it will be nothing short of traumatizing.
I am almost certain there will be balloon animals and moldy hummus – like my friends would eat that anyway. The guests are probably filing into the backyard right now, laughing at me behind their wrapped packages. I am the butt of all jokes; the laughing stock, but I can deal.
If my parents weren’t so damn happy about it, I would totally blow it off. I would skip the event all together and head to Beatty’s to play his Playstation and eat pizza. We could pretend it’s just a regular day, where I am not forced to make nice with people I don’t want or care to know.
The reflection in the mirror stares back at me. I look ridiculous. I would never wear this much pink if they hadn’t insisted. I would never paint this much gunk on my face if they hadn’t asked. Oh, God… I can tell it’s going to be a nightmare.
I am pretty sure the purpose of this party is not necessarily to celebrate my birthday; they are looking for acceptable husbands. Like I would marry one of those pimple-faced booger eaters.
They want to marry me off, so I can move out of their house. They want time to do things together. Probably run around naked, or something equally gross.
“Bridget,” the walkie-talkie I’m holding hums.
I gather my strength and reply, “Yes, mother?”
“It’s time.”
“Are you sure this is a good idea?” I really don’t want to go, but I can’t tell her that.
“Sweetie, you’re only fifteen once.” I can hear the smile in her voice. She loves me; I know. This will make her incredibly happy, so I will do it. I will paste a sickening smile on my painted face and walk down the stairs, out to the back yard, and try not to die.
I can’t make any promises.
This is also my submission to contest going on at Deanna Schrayer's blog. Check out her site: HERE
Ouch. What a tormented soul. It's hard to be pushed into a mold, particularly when it's the wrong one. I really feel for her.
ReplyDelete~jon
I like your writing style...a healthy dose of emotion with a nice pinch of humor - "They want time to do things together. Probably run around naked, or something equally gross."
ReplyDeleteNice Tomara - the joys of growing up. =D
ReplyDeleteI remember those days of my parents making me do all sorts of dumb stuff. You captured the angst perfectly, Tomara, Well done...
ReplyDeleteImagine how much more torture her sweet 16 will be!
ReplyDeleteStrong contender, 2.
Yikes, great and horrifying story. And she's only 15? Poor girl. I hope she can break free soon.
ReplyDeleteExcellent writing here.
This sums up many a family get together... Ouch, glad I'm the other side of it now
ReplyDeleteabsolutely hilarious that the family would communicate by walky-talky - I loved that! It really gets over that her party was like some sort of corporate event
ReplyDeletemarc nash
Poor thing.
ReplyDeleteNice capture of teenage angst!
Poor kid! She's probably glad she'll only turn fifteen once. I was never much of a pink wearer, either. You portray her emotion perfectly!
ReplyDeleteCD
I feel your MC's pain. Loose the pink and makeup and thes rest of your piece takes me right back. Very well done!
ReplyDeleteI was sure the walkie talkie was to have some consolation from her friend you totally caught me on this, heh.
ReplyDeleteGreat job putting so diverse words and expressions together. I can feel her pain.
I was sure the walkie talkie was to have some consolation from her friend you totally caught me on this, heh.
ReplyDeleteGreat job putting so diverse words and expressions together. I can feel her pain and I'm also cheering for her to break free of all this "pinkiness".
Hilarious take on who teenagers see and act with their parents. And vice-versa. Funny too - hope she survives
ReplyDeleteI love the MC's voice in this. Argh, what a tough childhood. I can't imagine what her 16th will be like.
ReplyDeleteI love this! You nailed the voice and attitude perfectly. Excellent job!
ReplyDeleteThis is really great and you say much more than what is written. Although she hates it, there is a lot of love in that family. Nicely done
ReplyDeleteLots to like here, but my favorite phrase is, "I will paste a sickening smile on my painted face...."
ReplyDeleteOh horrible. Why do parents force this kind of crap on kids? I love the fact she is rebelling though...
ReplyDeleteI really liked this. I can relate strongly to Bridget's plight. I am dazzled by the fluid way you incorporated that key words into the story. I actually didn't notice that paragraph about the prompt until after I had read the story. I never would have guessed.
ReplyDeleteGreat Job.
Thanks everyone for reading and commenting. I wasn't very fond of pink and girlie as a teen either. I like it a bit more now, but I am 34. It took a long time to lose my angst... maybe last month ;-)
ReplyDelete~2
You really did do a good job of incorporating the prompts and giving your character a realistic personality. To me, it feels like the beginning of a longer story; I can imagine the teen angst and the conflicts with parents that kicks off either at the party or shortly thereafter. Well done.
ReplyDeleteI agree with the majority. You captured the teenage voice well. I was hoping Beatty would swoop in and rescue her. Maybe next time, eh?
ReplyDeleteP.S. That Kemari sounds sort of awesome ;)
Ha ha! Kemari gave you a frightful list and you pulled it off! Very funny and a good entry to the contest...radioactive cupcakes...snort.
ReplyDeleteYou had me at radioactive cupcakes. I couldn't get free after that!
ReplyDeleteWhat a delicious peek into a growing up mind - yet, she more than tolerates her parents. So, there's grace there too.
Nicely done - great voice in this.
The things we did to make our parents happy. My mom always pciked out boyfreinds for me and fixed me up on dates. hated it.. her taste in boys was awful.
ReplyDeleteNow I cannot help but wonder what a radioactive cupcake tastes like, and I am guessing thet they are easy to find in the dark.. they'd glow wouldn't they??
Everything's so DIRE when you're 15! :)
ReplyDeleteThis piece had a very authentic voice, just enough angst and teen outrage mixed with blasé resignation. Not bad for tossing it off with starter words like you did!
ReplyDeleteI love the idea of radioactive cupcakes and how the whole sequence hits that exaggerated quality some people have. Nice tale.
ReplyDeleteWhat a list of words! And what an amazing job you did with them. I love this Tomara! Moldy hummus and pimple-faced booger eaters - indeed! :)
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for entering the contest!
I think it's written on The Parents' Book, embarrass your kids while you can!! Great story.
ReplyDeleteI have to agree that you pulled off the teen angst well. This was a fun read. Nicely done with those word prompts!
ReplyDeleteWow, that's a GREAT job of capturing teen angst. Brilliant work!
ReplyDeleteYou did an excellent job of working in the list of word. They blend well with the story and nothing stands out as odd.
ReplyDeleteWell done
That's endearing - a girl who doesn't like to feel like a princess. Why can't the people who say they love us pay attention to what we really like?
ReplyDeleteNice story, Tomara. Hey, there's something for you over at my blog.
ReplyDeleteOh, the hardship of being a teen. Especially one forced to wear pink and attend lame parties. Great job with those words.
ReplyDeleteFeel so sorry for her!
ReplyDeletePulled me in - well written
Can't promise not to die. We all do it eventually. You can only promise that you will not bend to that Sweet Sixteen nonsense next year!
ReplyDeleteI pictured the radioactive cupcakes in day-glo colors. Maybe if the guests ate them first she would be able to see inside them and find out what they are really made of.
ReplyDeletepimple-faced booger eaters hahaha :-D
ReplyDeleteKept us guessing her age until the last. loved it
Mon xx
Great job recapturing all the things we hated about being a teen.
ReplyDeleteJust a quick note to Tomara’s readers - there's less than 15 hours left to vote in the contest. Have you cast your vote?
ReplyDeleteWe'll be partying at The Other Side of Deanna on Monday. I hope everyone can stop in!
Tradition's a hard thing to butt your head against, especially when it's important to people you care about.
ReplyDeleteNice one.
Hi Tomara. We're having a party today - hope you and your readers can stop in: http://theothersideofdeanna.wordpress.com/2010/08/16/party-time/
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for entering the contest!